Category Archives: family

Day 35: Proekt 365 (A family snowman affair)

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Day 35: Proekt 365 Neighbourhood snowman & the family who made him

Day 35: Proekt 365
Neighbourhood snowman & the family who made him

This was perhaps my favourite moment of the year so far. Or at least one which became even lovelier as I was taking my daily photo.

Today, as The Cuban and I took a quick break and brisk walk through the neighbourhood, we stumbled upon this jolly frozen fellow, complete with a carrot nose. I whipped out my trusty Galaxy S III to take a picture for my daily blog of all things lovely and who should pop up in the window behind him but the little girl, her mother and brother, whom I’m assuming made him. They waved and smiled and waved and smiled the entire time I fumbled and waved and tried to take my photo. (If you look carefully in the upper left-hand section of the photo, you can see their shapes just barely.) It’s a good thing I got the photo the first time—this was the only one I managed to snap in the few minutes were stood there!

I don’t honestly know who was more delighted: us or them? The snowman was more than sufficient to make my day brighter. But, the sight of that lovely family — mother, dauther and son — waving just as idiotically back at us as we were at them was truly wonderful and heart-warming, particularly in a country were emotional displays such as this are rare.

It’s true: if you smile at someone, they will most likely return that smile.

Day 28: Proekt 365 (A note of adoration)

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Day 28: Proekt 365 Silly notes in random places from my adoring husband

Day 28: Proekt 365
Silly notes in random places make me smile

We are fond of silliness in this home. Very fond.

One habit we formed very early in our relationship was the random placement of notes to one another in places we’d least expect to find them. These are not the ‘I’ve gone to the supermarket / work / gym / ice fishing’ type notes. They may or may not have something to do with a household chore, but normally they are just little message that we’ll ‘get’, but others would find puzzling or just plain weird. I love them. I love that he normally illustrates his notes to me.

This afternoon, as I was rooting around for some afternoon grub, I found the above note on top of the leftovers from my dinner last night. Not being a huge fan of chicken, my husband wasn’t shy at all about letting his feelings be known about this particular dinner item. Evidently when he put the container in the refrigerator last night, he was inspired to share his thoughts. Through a note.

It took me completely by surprise when I found it today. It made me giggle. And, that’s the point. A little random bit of silliness to make us smile and hopefully giggle.

(And, to remind me in case I’d forgotten that he is not a fan of chicken!)

Day 26: Proekt 365 (She hoo shall be named ‘Cheek’)

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Day 26: Proekt 365 Owl? Or Queen of Cheek?

Day 26: Proekt 365
Owl? Or Queen of Cheek?

Today, I was quite fortunate to have been graced by the Queen of Cheek honouring me by settling on my lap for all of 15 minutes. Does she do so looking sweet and thoroughly cat-like? Does she curl up in a little ball and wrap her tail around her head? Nope. She comes wearing her owl face.

Oh, Che Fufu. I keep expecting you to hoot.

The affections of my cat come when she wants to give them. Yes, I know. If I wanted unconditional and constant affection, I should’ve gotten a dog. But, you see…Che Fufu is my cat, but my husband’s dog.

When I call her, she looks at me as if I were an annoying mosquito or puppy that jumps and keeps inviting her to play, with an expression that says, ‘You must be kidding, human’. Yet, my husband calls her, and she runs and leaps over furniture to get to him as fast as her little legs will carry her and flies through the air with much grace and ease.

I’ll take what I can get and enjoy her attention when she gives it. The remainder of the time we have an understanding: I, human with opposable thumbs, will feed her, clean her littler box, clean up her hair, hairballs and stray bits of litter that are constantly tracked through the house and play and pet her when she wishes; she, cat with a mind utterly her own, will grace me with affection at her own pace, when she wishes and will also leave signs of her love in the form of hairballs and bits of stray litter everywhere.

But, isn’t she lovely?

Days 20 & 21: Proekt 365 (Why my husband is awesome)

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In case you missed it, yesterday was lovely (</sarcasm>). A particularly sudden and thoroughly lovely stomach bug finally reared it’s ugly head, leaving me feeling miserable and sleepless all whilst facing a deadline. I missed my deadline, but was graciously given an extension by that particular and amazingly understanding client (I owe you HUGE). But, I was pretty much a mess by yesterday evening. Think weepy and whiney and not particularly pleasant in any way.

Enter my awesome husband.

Day 19: Proekt 365 My husband chanelling South Park

Day 20: Proekt 365
My husband channeling South Park

(Whilst I may not have actually posted this pic yesterday, I did take it.) Not only did he provide the support and care I needed, but he also braved the Arctic blasts once again to get me and my unhappy tummie crackers. On top of that, he provided a little comedic relief at a key moment. Yes, he is just that awesome.

Once I finally gave up on finishing work yesterday and migrated from my desk of misery to the sofa of suffering, he tucked me in, made sure I had all of the necessary items to help me feel better, brought me whatever I’d forgotten and gave reassuring kisses and glances until I finally passed out. What would I do without him? (I honestly hope I never have to experience that reality again.)

As if all of this awesomeness wasn’t enough, I woke up this morning (feeling much improved, thankfully!) to find the following:

Day 20: Proekt 365 Who doesn't love a clean screen or two?

Day 21: Proekt 365
Who doesn’t love a clean screen or two?

Not only does he get what I need when I’m sick, but he also gets that I cannot stand dirty screens. So, knowing that I would probably want to clean my desk today (which I desperately do), and, in particular, give a bit of extra attention to my monitors (which need it), he left the screen cleaner on my desk for me to easily find. I repeat, he is just that awesome.

We recently had a bit of a discussion in our local electronics Mecca about buying another bottle of screen cleaner so I wouldn’t have to rifle through his desk / office to find the bottle he bought. He thought I was being silly, which I was. But, I honestly don’t want to disturb his desk, not because I think it would bother him. But, because it would bother me (not him looking through my desk, but me looking through his). I know he doesn’t have anything to hide (nor do I). But, it’s ‘his’ space….and I don’t want to somehow taint it. (Silly, I know.)

So, deadline monkey has been firmly removed from my back, my tummie is now a bit more tolerant of things other than water, weak tea and crackers, and my desk is in thorough need of cleaning. But, most importantly and more consistently than anything else in my life, my husband is awesome.

Day 19: Proekt 365 (That which makes me smile)

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Day 19: Proekt 365 That which makes me smile

Day 19: Proekt 365
That which makes me smile

Today has not gone at all to plan. At. All.

Largely my own doing, I’ve had a tedious, frustrating, would-rather-pull-the-covers-over-my-head sort of day. I’m behind and staring down the barrel of a deadline, I’m not feeling at all my best (sniff, sniff, cough, cough) and, quite frankly, I’d love nothing better than to pound my fists on my keyboard and desk rather than gently punch the keys at the moment. Yeap, not a great day.

Then, there’s the image above. My darling husband and cheeky cat have been incredibly patient all day with me. The Cuban quietly left the flat at the best of moments (largely because I was impossible and I suspect it was better out in the arctic blast than inside listening to me and my monumental meltdown of sighs and whines). Upon his return, I finally pulled myself away from the chains of my desk for a few moments to catch these two lovely beasts of mine in this pose.

How could my day not immediately improve?

It’s still a rather crappy day (again, mea culpa). But, it’s bearable due in large measure to the moments of loveliness and silliness my little furry family provides.

Thanks, my darlings! I couldn’t do it without you, and tomorrow will be infinitely better!

Day 18: Proekt 365 (Even when we’re sad)

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Day 18: Proekt 365 Cheeky Che Fufu. Need I say more?

Day 18: Proekt 365
Cheeky Che Fufu. Need I say more?

We’re not in the happiest of moods today. A very early morning finds us awake and readying for Jr Cuban’s departure. We’re all sad.

And, then there’s this. Our darling beast of a cat, who is sassy, cheeky, silly and utterly uncatlike most of the time. Vying for some early morning affection, I caught her in this pose. This is not an unusual pose.

After we return from the airport one human (aka tool) short, she’ll be just as needy and sad as us humans are. This is why we love her so. She is an extension of us. Yet, even when we just want to curl up in little balls and cry our eyes out, she has the ability to make us smile / laugh / giggle wildly.

Thank you, Che Fufu. We’re still hoping to clone you.

Day 17: Proekt 365 (A little something for the journey)

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Day 17: Proekt 365 Brownies for the long journey home

Day 17: Proekt 365
Brownies for the long journey home

In another familiar ‘tradition’, the last night of my step-son’s visit has me baking brownies for him to take along on his long journey home tomorrow. It isn’t nearly as far as his grandfather’s journey was this past summer, but I did the same thing for El Maestro a few months ago. And, now as was the case then, I am filled with a mixture of happiness and sadness — delight that they want the brownies; sad that they will be leaving Finland much, much too soon.

I may not be able to have long philosophical conversations with either of them, but I can (and will always gladly) cook for them. Hopefully, regardless of where they eat them, both El Maestro and The Jr Cuban know that those brownies were made with a heaps of love. And, maybe, just a tiny tear or two dropped into them as well.

Day 16: Proekt 365 (Like father, like son)

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Day 16: Proekt 365 Despite distance and time, the similarites are profound

Day 16: Proekt 365
Despite distance and time, these two are so much alike

‘Like father, like son’. That phrase has been on constant repeat this week much as it was this past summer when my father-in-law visited us. Neither time nor distance can alter the similarities between these three generations of men. Perhaps, ‘like father, like son, like son’ is more appropriate.

The Jr Cuban is a young man now, and his own young man at that. He’s changed so much in the few years since we’ve seen him last and has ‘grown up’. His own young man he may be, but he is definitely The Jr Cuban. Witnessing the little cues and hints that he is my husband’s son through the unconscious expressions and behaviours is such a treat. As one example, they both wore the exact same expressions when I was taking a series of photos yesterday. Exactly the same. How does that happen, particularly when The Jr Cuban is with us far too infrequently?

This summer on a long walk with the elder Cuban (aka El Maestro) when he was visiting us, I witnessed my husband (The Cuban) doing exactly the same thing his son does when they are peripatetically bonding. It was an instant and it was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. It made The Jr Cuban’s behaviour so much more relevant and meaningful. There have been other moments when I’ve seen all three of them exhibit subtle cues that they are indeed all part of a longer thread separated only by time. Each observation brings a mixture of smiles and tears — these seemingly insignificant behaviours are normally the things I love most about my husband (and also those which drive me crazy at times!).

Like father, like son, like son.

It’s a shame all three of them can’t be here at the same time. Of course, it’d also probably be the end of every last hair on my head since getting out the door requires infinitely more patience than I am ever going to be capable of (which also makes me smile!). Still, any visit is better than no visit at all. And, I’m loving this one.

I may not ‘get’ 95% of what is going on (my Spanish is non-existent, and they speak incredibly quickly). But, I see that they ‘get’ one another. At the end of the day, that’s most important. From their adoring concern for Che Fufu, to discussions of the best type of cheese for pastelitos de guayaba, parkour and more pressing and touchy (as well as necessary) topics, the sound of these two bonding (The Cuban and Jr Cuban) is like music. And, a sweeter melody exists nowhere. (Well, except perhaps the dulcet tones of El Maestro and The Cuban bonding… .)

I love these men who are now my family. Oh, what a family it is.

Day 10: Proekt 365

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Day 10: Proekt 365 A little inside family joke to welcome The Jr Cuban to Helsinki

Day 10: Proekt 365
A little inside family joke to welcome The Jr Cuban to Helsinki

It’s an inside joke, and one which dates back to the first time my step-son stayed with us in Helsinki, which also coincided with our move here six-and-a-half years ago. Like most inside jokes, it stuck.

An added bonus to reliving this family humour was the shocked expression of a Spanish speaker at the Starbucks at the airport upon seeing our sign.

Welcome, Seba. We’re so, so happy you’re here!

Day 4: Proekt 365

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Day 4: Proekt 365 My first finished object for 2014. It will not be the last.

Day 4: Proekt 365
My first finished object for 2014. It will not be the last.

What on earth did I do before a friend re-introduced me to the world of knitting and other needlecrafts a few years ago? Has it really only been three years since I picked up a pair of needles and dove into the fine fibre world of k2, p3*?

It’s hard to believe, but, yes, just 3 years ago my friend Brad (who lives in Amsterdam with his fabulous husband and bestest of hounds, Rusty) talked of knitting, and I asked if he’d be willing to show me how at some point. At the time, I was quite stressed and thought it might be a way to re-focus my mind, whilst also providing a creative outlet. It had been years since I’d knit anything and I never really finished a project. I was more of a happy hooker in my youth (minds out of the gutter, please!). In an incredibly kind gesture, Brad gave me a set of bamboo needles and provided a bit of instruction and inspiration just before / after New Year’s Eve 2010-11.

Little did we know….

When I returned to Helsinki after that New Year’s trip with my husband, I found a group of expat women in Helsinki who are a part of the American Women’s Club in Finland and who meet regularly to knit, crochet, craft and generally support and help one another. Not only did I get some incredibly helpful guidance on knitting, but I’ve also and perhaps more importantly forged lifelong friendships with quite a few talented, brilliant and exceptionally kind women.  I honestly don’t know how I’d have mentally and emotionally survived these past several years without knitting, but more specifically without the friends I’ve made through my crafting journey.

Knitting has also reminded me of one of the most amazing women I’ve ever been fortunate enough to have in my life — my grandmother. Katharine ‘Babe’ Louise Baring Fuller was not only one of the wittiest and strongest of women I’ve ever known, she was incredibly gifted with a rare and precious talent.

Born and raised (in Texas) at time when women’s roles were very much different to today, and when skills such as sewing and crafting were expected rather than honed as luxurious hobbies, she took her craft seriously. When I was a young girl, she taught me the fine skill of touching and feeling fabrics before looking at labels to determine quality and fibre content. When working on a particular craft, she demonstrated how patience is just as important as technique — if you rush a project, you’re likely to mistakes no matter how skilled you are (which is a lesson that transcends all of life it seems, and one which has taken a long, long time to finally learn).

In addition to her random acts of silliness and infectious laugh, I will forever recall how zen-like she was when crafting. She was an expert seamstress who made her own clothes and whose sewing ‘station’ I would do just about anything to have now. Sewing for her was more a matter of necessity since she was so, so tiny and petite sizes were rarely if ever an option. We would browse the latest fashions  on offer at Saks and Neiman’s and then she would go buy the fabric and make it herself. Her skills were impressive then; but, I am even more in awe of her now that I understand just what goes into making one’s own clothes without a pattern. She was incredible.

But, her real artistry and talent was most visible in her needlepoint. From the very large Christmas stockings with images and scenes matching the passions and personalities of each family member she made one year to the various throw pillows around the house and pictures of idyllic scenes on the walls of every family member’s home, the woman was absolutely gifted. Her work was impeccably perfect and each viewing reveals further details that were all of her own design. Needlepoint mesh was her canvas, and she painted with passion through her needles and thread.

The image of her sitting serenely in her love seat surrounded by the tools of her craft with a look of utter solace and complete focus and joy as she worked is forever burned into my consciousness. Zen and the Art of Needlecraft, I say. And, it’s master is and always shall be Grandma.

Whilst I wish that I could share my projects with her now, it comforts me to feel as though I’m carrying on her legacy. (I’d say big shoes to fill, but the woman had incredibly tiny feet!) It may be a different type of needle and thread (although she did knit and crochet as well), I know she’d be proud and it gives me no small measure of joy to know that at least some of her talent seems to have made its way to me.

She’d also find all those various dropped stitches, and totally understand and relate to my quest for perfection in everything I knit or craft.

Knitting has given me infinitely more than I ever expected. I can’t imagine a day that didn’t include some form of crafting even if for a few stolen moments. From knitting to crochet to quilting or sewing, each stitch reminds me of the friends it has brought my way as well as how it connects me to my beloved grandmother. As if all of that wasn’t enough, it has also brought me an unusual form of mediation and a few lovely pairs of socks, scarves, hats and blankets to ward off the winter chill.

For all of this and infinitely more, I am immeasurably grateful. (Thank you, thank you, thank you, Brad and all the Helsinki Knittas!)

*k2, p3 refers to ‘knit 2 stitches, purl 3 stitches’, for those not in the know. 😉