My own reasons for not having children are complex and varied, and entirely my own. The responses to many I’ve met who can’t get their heads around my own decision not to bear children have been less than kind and often quite judgmental and absurd.
That said, I love my own step-son and my closest friends’ kids more than I know how to express. And, it’s a real treat to be in and a part of their lives.
To the women who choose not to have kids, I have one thing to say: thank you.
You probably don’t hear it enough. In fact, you probably don’t hear it at all. What you do hear is an array of pro-childbearing responses, such as, “You’ll change your mind someday,” or, “Doesn’t your mother want grandkids?” or, “You’ll never find a husband if you never want to have kids.”
All things considered, “thank you” is probably on the opposite end of what you hear.
But seriously: thank you. Thank you for recognizing that childrearing isn’t for you and being true to who you are. It doesn’t mean you hate kids. It just means that raising one is not part of your path in life.
Thank you for not succumbing to the societal pressures. I’ve known far too many parents who had kids because that’s what was expected of them. Working in…
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